Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Randomize
