Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize