Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
