called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize