Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
Welp...herpes.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
