how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize
