I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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