put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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