Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize