Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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