Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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