So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Randomize
