New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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