okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
