The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Randomize
