Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
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