She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
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