I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
Randomize
