she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Your cock deserves a montage
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
