just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize
