Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Randomize
