Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Randomize
