Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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