my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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