he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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