His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
This baby is an asshole
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
