I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
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