she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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