Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Randomize
