If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
