But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
