is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize