Your dad touched me again.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
