I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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