people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
