ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Acid is not a monday night drug
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Randomize
