The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
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