I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
