we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I'm bleeding and have questions
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
