I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
