the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
