How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize
