please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize
