I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Randomize
