I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Are we in a gay sports bar?
Redeem this text for a blowjob
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Randomize