you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
