At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize