cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
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