Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
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