it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
